Thursday, November 02, 2006


Let’s take a moment and appreciate the significance of what is going on around you right now. If you have not heard yet, Bob Barker, host of the game show “The Price is Right” is stepping down after 35 years. This man is a legend. You know why. Because his job for 35 years consisted of standing around and talking for an hour, 5 days a week. Rest assured that he made a boatload of money for his mindless banter. Wouldn’t you love to make a boatload of money for standing around talking? Oh wait, he also got to hang out with beautiful models for 35 years. And he slept with one of them and had them fired when he felt like it. Sure, there was some lawsuits, but what did it matter to him, the network took care of everything. So remember when you were thinking about how much you would like to make a boatload of money for smiling, standing and talking? How do you feel about it now that you know about the girls? And what about all the contestants kissing him? Sure there were some grannies and probably trannies, but some of those girls were spectacular. And his vocabulary never had to go much deeper than “car, hot tub, golf clubs, vacation, and showcase showdown”. You know what words doctors have to learn to get rich “myocardial, defibrillator, hematoma….” See my point? This man is very rich, very famous, hangs with models, still has all of his hair, and has to do very little at his job for all this. Did I forget to mention he is trained in martial arts by none other than the Champ Chuck Norris? It’s true, you can look it up.

Bob Barker, you are a man’s man and a champion of society, we salute you.


Check out some of the sordid details at this link….

And don’t forget to spay or neuter your pets.


JargonBear said...

That's it. I'm calling in sick from school for the rest of his tenure on the show. Why? Because everyone knows that the best thing about being sick when you were young was watching that womanizer in action.

Anonymous said...

I don't answer to posts, I'm on my own schedule. Besides, do I really want to ask you about your childhood when you beat off to Jem and the Hollograms? I'd rather eat my soccer shoe.

JargonBear said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
JargonBear said...

Seems to me, you're the one that repeatedtly makes everything about balls. Where is the logical segue way between soccer boots and balls? I don't think there is one, but you made it in your previous comment, and now you're talking about eating it.
Closet ball eater!