Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Return of Humpday

It’s everybody’s favorite day, Wednesday! I thought I’d mix things up a bit for this weeks installment of Humpday, so without further ado;

Yes, No, No

This one was easy. It was as if someone had lined up three viruses. When faced with a decision between Hantavirus, human-immune deficiency, and influenza, sign me up for the flu every time. Automatic I tell ya.

Hilary Duff is everything the other two are not. Actually the other two are everything Hilary Duff is not. Dirty, Diseased, Dim Witted, contaminated, unhealthy, untalented…



Yes, Yes, No

You know how sometimes, you’re attracted to some people and for the life of you, you can explain why. Like why Archie for some reason kept that douchebag Veronica around when he was so obviously a better fit for Betty. Well, Sandra Bullock is that girl for me. If I were to give her ten ratings for various aspects of her life, she would invariably score no higher than a six on any one of them, but somehow when I add all the scores together she would get a 95. It’s odd I know, but I just roll with it.

The little girl in the middle, even though she’s four foot nine, I gotta do it. I don’t know why. She’s a pretty average actor, she’s fairly average looking, she’s dating a total sack, but somehow I think if it came down to it, I’d still hit it. It’s like at the club, when the night is getting late, you’re standards get real low. Well the ugly lights just came on, but I’m in the back of the club where they don’t quite reach. I can tell they’re on, but Shara here in front of me, isn’t quite illuminated. All I gotta do is find a way to sneak Shara here out a back door and in to a cab before a) my friends catch me or b) my buzz wears off and I come to my senses. Either way I’m in for a rough morning when a) my friends bust in or b) I call her Shara again. (They’re much less forgiving in the morning)

You know how some people despise Brussel sprouts? Well I despise Gwyneth

Todays winners;



Jb

1 comment:

themadhatter said...

Did you see the footage for Sandra's acceptance speech at the Hollywood Awards? Apparently her and Jesse James made some sweet loving the night before. She said so. She thanked him for his ability and everyone laughed. Then she said, "You have no idea what you are missing" or something like that.