Do you know who that is in the first pic? It’s Polly. The world’s first genetically engineered sheep. Remember her? I don’t know how old she would be, maybe eight, ?(what's that is sheep years?) but the point is, mankind has found a way to recreate DNA and make a clone of a living animal. Pretty impressive stuff. Don’t you think? Oh you don’t. You think that opening that beer bottle with your teeth is impressive. Huh. Well, you’re right, but this is pretty neat too….
Not only do we have the ability to 
create something from scratch that is 100% alike to another living organism, but we can actually change things in mid life to resemble other living organisms. Now the genetic make-up will not be identical as in the Polly example but I think we can all agree that Ashley looks a lot better and a lot more similar to Jessica, than she used to.Now, the point of all this is…
Smarter people than you have found some pretty ingenious ways to do some fairly amazing things but I’m supposed to believe the best way to dry my hands in a public place is to hold them under some piece of sh!% hot air box for about 14 minutes? I think the only reason my hands get remotely dry is from the fumes coming from my face as I rage at the ineffectiveness of those mechanical failures. The Asian team can make coconut MP3 players and we can’t produce something effective to dry off our hands!? UNACCEPTABLE! (note the unadulterated outrage being described through the use of the caps lock button).
Really, can we do something about this? I’m tired of walking out of public restrooms and having to wipe my hands on my sweatpants. It raises the risk of just getting the boogers back on my fingers. And that is just obscene.
Jargonbear
and while you’re at it, find a way to make baseball vaguely entertaining.
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